Me too!
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Randomize
