Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
