so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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