and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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