the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
