All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
