i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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