is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
