dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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