if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
