i don't like sucking hair
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Randomize
