Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
