He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Can I color on your dick again?
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Randomize