whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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