ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
