She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Shame is for Republicans.
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