Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
