She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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