I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
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