And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Randomize