tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
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