He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Randomize
