her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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