We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
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