i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
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