I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
