Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize
