you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
