Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
