I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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