How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize