At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
