I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
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