i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
