i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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