between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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