return my video game
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize