So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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