You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
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