i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Randomize
