She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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