come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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