Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
My Sexting was not on an AP level
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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