I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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