Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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