i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Randomize
