when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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