2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Are we still banned from the library?
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
