Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
