Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
