If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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