I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
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